It's TJ Time

Movies on Film: Spring Breakers Review

Mon, 03 Jun 2013 11:15:01 -0400

By: T.J. “Spriiiing breeeaaak… spriiiing breeeaaak forever” Mulligan

The sun is shining high up in the sky, the sand sinks its granulated heat between your toes, the surf swells and fills the air with the scent of salt and refuse (and, depending on the beach you’re at, crude oil). All these…

I, like many others, have waited 7 years for the chance to catch up with Michael, George-Michael,...

Mon, 27 May 2013 14:08:20 -0400

I, like many others, have waited 7 years for the chance to catch up with Michael, George-Michael, GOB, Buster, Lindsay, George Sr., Lucille, Lucille 2, Tobias, Maeby, Steve Holt, Carl Weathers and the rest of the amazing cast of characters that make up Arrested Development. I was elated to hear it was coming back and knew that when it did, with all the episodes being available to watch on Netflix on day one, that it wouldn’t take long for me to get through all of them. The show started back up yesterday and, as of a few moments ago, I’ve done just that.

In many ways this show has changed. Likely due to the busy schedules of the actors involved, the show, which used to rely on the mixing of the stories of the ensemble cast in every episodes, has scaled down in scope to focus more strictly on one particular character per episode. While others appear throughout, this experience is pretty jarring at first for those familiar with previous style. I’ll have to admit, I wasn’t into the first few episodes like I’d hoped I’d be. I actually started to worry that the show was perhaps better left buried than to be resurrected into this new and much less funny version. It is only after a handful of more episodes that the cohesive story of this season starts to take shape and that familiar level of comfort begins to return. As more characters receive their own episodes to tell the stories of what they’d been through the last few years, they begin to appear more in other characters’ episodes and with more substantial parts to play. By the end it all begins to tie itself into a nice, neat little bow and leaves the viewer once again yearning for more.

Kudos to Mitchell Hurwitz and all of the cast and crew that brought this back. You had me worried for a little bit but I’m so glad to have more of the show I love and super high on these new episodes. Now don’t ever leave me again.

T.J.'s Top 5 Favorite Music Videos

Sat, 25 May 2013 00:51:52 -0400

I grew up in a time when channels like MTV and VH1 played music videos. And I’m not just talking about from the the hours of 3 to 4 in the morning, I mean for the better part of the day. It was a love for the art form of the music video that led me to have a better understanding and appreciation of the art form of cinema and for visual arts in general. The other night I got to thinking about which music videos I would consider my favorites so I compiled this list. Perhaps one day I’ll explain my selections, but for now here they are in simple list form:

5. “Paranoid Android” - Radiohead

4. “Sabotage” - Beastie Boys

3. “Coffee” - Aesop Rock

2. “Everlong” - Foo Fighters

1. “Star Guitar” - The Chemical Brothers

Movies on Film: The Hangover Part III Review

Fri, 24 May 2013 18:53:17 -0400

Movies on Film: The Hangover Part III Review:

moviesonfilm:

By: T.J. “someone needs to burn this place to the ground” Mulligan

Over the Memorial Day Weekend of 2011, I and many of my fellow Americans were unceremoniously and severely burned. It wasn’t caused by wildfire or errant firework displays. No, we were all burned by going to the theater. You…

Well, it was better than the last one.

Pro Wrestlers vs. Zombies Trailer

Wed, 01 May 2013 09:02:47 -0400

Am I having a fever dream or something? What the fuck is going on here?

I was looking for something to watch on Netflix and came across this little guy. I clicked it and...

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 05:13:01 -0400

I was looking for something to watch on Netflix and came across this little guy. I clicked it and was taken to this part in the episode:

Kudos to the team at Netflix for including this fun little Easter Egg. May 26th cannot get here soon enough.

mooshoo: Why do a lot of us go to the movies? To have fun,...

Fri, 05 Apr 2013 00:57:24 -0400

mooshoo:

Why do a lot of us go to the movies? To have fun, right? Tonight I went to go see the Evil Dead remake/reboot/sequel. It was the most fun that I’ve had at the movies in a long time.

There were people in the audience screaming; there were people walking out; there were people jumping out of their seats and people laughing at just how ridiculously gory this film is. I realize that horror films aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if you have any interest in seeing Evil Dead, I highly, highly recommend seeing it with an audience.

It’s really great.

Movies on Film: Identity Thief Review

Sat, 23 Mar 2013 07:30:00 -0400

Movies on Film: Identity Thief Review:

moviesonfilm:

By: T.J. “read it on wikiHow” Mulligan

It’s March, meaning we’re three months into the new year and, thus far, there have been no releases dispensed into theaters that make me want to spend any of my hard-earned money. But I have a girlfriend, and we get increasingly bored watching…

This is the first review I’ve made since Tumblr changed to this in-screen box format. For the record, it’s such a giant pain in the ass.

mooshoo: Bengals, please don’t fuck this up. It’s nice...

Sat, 05 Jan 2013 09:05:58 -0500

mooshoo:

Bengals, please don’t fuck this up.

It’s nice to be one of only 12 teams still allowed to play, but another loss in the Wild Card round would be an absolute downer. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Go Bengals!

This Christmas was pretty great for me. Everybody seemed to enjoy the gifts I got them and my gifts...

Tue, 01 Jan 2013 10:16:00 -0500

This Christmas was pretty great for me. Everybody seemed to enjoy the gifts I got them and my gifts weren’t half bad themselves. Even though I got a bevy of riches this holiday season, my favorite gift by far is this chair I got from my girlfriend:

I’ve taken it for a couple test drives (and I can already tell you it’s a damn sight better than my last chair), but I haven’t actually gotten to sit in it without also wearing multiple layers of clothing. Today, after a 12-hour New Years Eve shift, I arrive home with one layered goal: get drunk and celebrate as if noon were my official start of the new year and play Madden, all while sitting in my kick-ass new chair. After getting adequately prepared, I walked to the chair and took a comfy seat. Since I don’t listen to the repetitively awful commentary of Madden, I reached for my laptop to turn on my iTunes. As my fingers touched the metal, my laptop magically morphed into this guy:

I had to walk around the room, it shocked me so bad. I decided that this injustice must not stand and took to my most trusted resource: Google. I searched for ways to rid oneself of the Static Menace and came upon a link to an article on eHow. Don’t get me wrong, it gets the job done, but the ordering of the suggestions is terrible. Seriously, how are your first two suggestion ways that take so much more work, cost the same or more and DON’T EVEN SOLVE THE PROBLEM AT HAND? eHow Contributer, if that is your real name, here’s how you do it for lower-middle class suburbanites who would actually search for “How to Get Rid of Static Electricity in Your Microfiber Furniture” on the internet:

They make spray called Static Guard or some such shit. Go out and buy it at a store.

There are other ways too, but they generally cost the same or more. If you still want to find them out, just search “Homemade Ways to Get Rid of Static Electricity in Your Microfiber Furniture”.

So, yeah, it’s been a good Christmas… and a shocking New Year.

A Very Television Christmas: Episode 5

Thu, 06 Dec 2012 08:45:32 -0500

Show: Arrested Development

Episode: “Afternoon Delight”

Description: The Bluth Company Christmas party is coming up and it’s acting president, Gob, has been starting to alienate the employees with boasts about his suits. Meanwhile, Michael is trying to avoid a clingy Lucille, upset about Buster being away at Army, and spend more time with George Michael, who has been spending more of his time with Ann. Michael gets help rebuilding the annually-demolished frozen banana stand by Maeby, who is feeling once again neglected by her parent’s. The two decide to hang together to make George Michael and Lindsay jealous, leading to some awkward karaoke.

Thoughts: Another classic Arrested Development episode. Everything from Gob bragging about the price of his suits, to Tobias’s many misfortunes, to the two separate implications of incest brought about by the singing of “Afternoon Delight”, this episode is filled with classic lines and classic moments. Like the last episode, there is very little to do with Christmas outside of the setting, but still a very good watch.

Favorite Lines: Gob: “Sure, the guy in the $600 banana suit… Come on!”

A Very Television Christmas: Episode 4

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 06:30:26 -0500

Show: Arrested Development

Episode: “In God We Trust”

Description: With the traditional Christmas “Living Classics Pageant” coming up, the family has to decide whether they should spend $20,000 to get George Sr. out of prison to take part. Michael and Lindsay, who have started becoming closer, are upset that this is a priority and don’t want Barry Zuckerkorn to be their lawyer. Lucille, however, wants to retain Barry because “he’s very good” and is moved to sabotage by Michael and Lindsay’s friendly behavior. Elsewhere, George Michael has to decide whether to take’s Buster’s spot as Adam in the pageant. Also Maeby’s plot to make her parent’s think she’s running away leads Gob to mistakenly believe Michael is headed to South America.

Thoughts: Hot damn I love this show. It never ceases to crack me up, even after so many viewings. This is also the episode that introduces a tremendously entertaining secondary character in the form of Wayne Jarvis. The episode is very loosely tied to the Christmas holiday, with nary a mention of it outside of the pageant, but does take place during the holiday season and features a few decorations here and there. Still, it’s Arrested Development, so it’s totally worth watching any time of year.

Favorite Lines: Wayne Jarvis: “I shall duck behind that little garbage car.”
Michael: “Guy’s a pro.”

A Very Television Christmas: Episode 3

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 05:38:08 -0500

Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode: “T-Shirt of the Dead”

Description: While on a trip to an Egyptian exhibit with Meatwad and Frylock, Master Shake discovers a t-shirt said to be worn by Osiris and possessing magical powers. Shake steals the shirt and attempts to conjure it’s power but is unable to. Because of the age of the shirt it “smells like ass” and Shake gives it to Meatwad to wash. Meatwad washes it with his Christmas stocking, discoloring and shrinking the shirt in the process. Because it now only fits Meatwad, he inherits the shirt and discovers quickly how to wield it’s powers.

Thoughts: This episodes is great if for no other reason than because it has the “Spacecataz” beginning. This episode has always cracked me up which slightly disturbs me. This episode is similar to the last in that it is set in a time of year outside of the Christmas season (sometime in Summer), and really only brings Christmas in incidentally because Meatwad uses his powers to make Santa appear. This may be a slightly anti-Christmas episode as well because Santa is gruesomely injured in this episode.

And it’s absolutely hilarious.

That’s what disturbs me

Favorite Line: Santa Claus: “Do you know that remote control race car he wants? Oh yeah, he’s gonna get it… far up his ass!”

A Very Television Christmas: Episode 2

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 02:14:00 -0500

Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode: “Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future”

Description: The Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future comes to visit Carl, reminding him of his childhood Christmas despite it being February. He claims to come back in December before exiting the house. At the same time, Shake arrives at Carl’s to inform him of a little problem with his pool… it’s filled with blood. The Cybernetic Ghost arrives again telling Carl and the gang inane stories of an ape version of Santa Claus and Elves from space.

Thoughts: That is more like a usual Aqua Teen episode description. It’s far more scattered but I find this episode to be a way funnier than “Mail-Order Bride”. It also features a pretty sweet voice cameo by Glenn Danzig. As stated in the description, the episode is set in February, making it only a partial Christmas episode, but does feature the scenes of Carl’s unfortunate childhood Christmas and the telling of the ape Santa, Sir Santa of Claus.

Favorite Line: Meatwad (in his attempted spooky voice): Daaaanzig… You want something to eeeeaaat!”

A Very Television Christmas: Episode 1

Wed, 05 Dec 2012 01:40:00 -0500

Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force

Episode: “Mail-Order Bride”

Description: It’s Christmas Eve and Master Shake and Carl are awaiting the arrival of their joint mail-order Cheznyan bride. Meatwad is also anxiously anticipating the arrival of Santa Claus, while all Frylock wants is a nice holiday (along with some sweet wrap-around shades). When Carl and Shake’s bride arrives, however, none of their plans come through as hoped.

Thoughts: First off, that may be the most concise description of what happens in an Aqua Teen Hunger Force episode ever written. Second, this is a pretty damn funny episode of a show that is consistently pretty damn funny. Meatwads quest for presents, such as hair, a blow dryer for said hair and a toy train, keep the holiday theme going throughout the episode, making this a solid choice for holiday viewing (if your a fan of cartoons on Adult Swim, that is).

Favorite Line: Master Shake: “The reason for the season is pleasin’.”

A Very Television Christmas

Tue, 04 Dec 2012 22:50:00 -0500

As I’m sure you’ve heard plenty of times the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Well for the last four or five years I have been insanely trying to watch every Christmas episode of some of my favorite television series, usually only starting about a week before the holiday itself. Considering that I have roughly 35 different shows on DVD and the advent of Netflix have made dozens more instantly available to me, I figured this year I could give it one more try. Starting today I will be attempting to go through these holiday-themed episodes, an endeavor I will be chronicling on this very blog for all of your viewing pleasure. Some of the episodes I watch will be seasonal staples, some will be obscure and bear little to do with the holidays at all, but all will be viewed and my thoughts on them will be shared.

It seems worth noting that I will not be adding Christmas or holiday specials to this list, such as those classics by Rankin-Bass or it’s contemporaries. These are only episodes and specials of shows that were or are episodic television series.

So pour a glass of egg nog, snuggle up around the tree and get ready to relive a little nostalgia with someone who already thinks that things used to be better “in my day.”

*Have a suggestion for something I should watch or want to comment on something I already have? Click on the “Ask Me Anything” tab toward the top of the page and fire away.

Just got back from seeing Skyfall again. If you haven’t...

Wed, 14 Nov 2012 01:21:00 -0500

Just got back from seeing Skyfall again. If you haven’t even seen it once yet then you are falling behind. Get on it.

Movies on Film: Skyfall Review

Mon, 12 Nov 2012 06:08:00 -0500

Movies on Film: Skyfall Review:

moviesonfilm:

By: Joshua “Every now and then a trigger needs pulled” Richey

Often imitated, never duplicated, Skyfall, the 23rd installment of Ian Flemming’s 007 series, manages to prove that the James Bond character is still evolving even 50 years after his big screen debut. The 007 reboot that launched…

While we usually agree for the most part, rarely do we ever agree as vehemently as we do on this. Fantastic film that seems to borrow (liberally) from The Dark Knight template, using and manipulating it to it’s benefit the whole way. Go see it ya knuckle heads.

Movies on Film: The Campaign Review

Thu, 11 Oct 2012 09:50:42 -0400

Movies on Film: The Campaign Review:

moviesonfilm:

By: T.J. “It’s a mess” Mulligan

The world of United States government contains a surprisingly large amount of “P” words associated with it: politics, pundits, precincts, platforms, publicity and… pugs? That at least holds true in the case of Marty Huggins, Zach Galifianakis’ character in the…

Grantland: Mockbuster Video

Thu, 11 Oct 2012 08:52:00 -0400

Grantland: Mockbuster Video:

Pretty interesting article from the always interesting Grantland website about The Asylum, the production company behind such films as Transmorphers and Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus.