Pro Wrestlers vs. Zombies Trailer
Am I having a fever dream or something? What the fuck is going on here?
It's TJ Time
Oh no, TJ has a blog
I was looking for something to watch on Netflix and came across this little guy. I clicked it and was taken to this part in the episode:
Kudos to the team at Netflix for including this fun little Easter Egg. May 26th cannot get here soon enough.
Why do a lot of us go to the movies? To have fun, right? Tonight I went to go see the Evil Dead remake/reboot/sequel. It was the most fun that I’ve had at the movies in a long time.
There were people in the audience screaming; there were people walking out; there were people jumping out of their seats and people laughing at just how ridiculously gory this film is. I realize that horror films aren’t everyone’s cup of tea, but if you have any interest in seeing Evil Dead, I highly, highly recommend seeing it with an audience.
It’s really great.
Movies on Film: Identity Thief Review
By: T.J. “read it on wikiHow” Mulligan
It’s March, meaning we’re three months into the new year and, thus far, there have been no releases dispensed into theaters that make me want to spend any of my hard-earned money. But I have a girlfriend, and we get increasingly bored watching…
This is the first review I’ve made since Tumblr changed to this in-screen box format. For the record, it’s such a giant pain in the ass.
Bengals, please don’t fuck this up.
It’s nice to be one of only 12 teams still allowed to play, but another loss in the Wild Card round would be an absolute downer. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best. Go Bengals!
This Christmas was pretty great for me. Everybody seemed to enjoy the gifts I got them and my gifts weren’t half bad themselves. Even though I got a bevy of riches this holiday season, my favorite gift by far is this chair I got from my girlfriend:
I’ve taken it for a couple test drives (and I can already tell you it’s a damn sight better than my last chair), but I haven’t actually gotten to sit in it without also wearing multiple layers of clothing. Today, after a 12-hour New Years Eve shift, I arrive home with one layered goal: get drunk and celebrate as if noon were my official start of the new year and play Madden, all while sitting in my kick-ass new chair. After getting adequately prepared, I walked to the chair and took a comfy seat. Since I don’t listen to the repetitively awful commentary of Madden, I reached for my laptop to turn on my iTunes. As my fingers touched the metal, my laptop magically morphed into this guy:
I had to walk around the room, it shocked me so bad. I decided that this injustice must not stand and took to my most trusted resource: Google. I searched for ways to rid oneself of the Static Menace and came upon a link to an article on eHow. Don’t get me wrong, it gets the job done, but the ordering of the suggestions is terrible. Seriously, how are your first two suggestion ways that take so much more work, cost the same or more and DON’T EVEN SOLVE THE PROBLEM AT HAND? eHow Contributer, if that is your real name, here’s how you do it for lower-middle class suburbanites who would actually search for “How to Get Rid of Static Electricity in Your Microfiber Furniture” on the internet:
They make spray called Static Guard or some such shit. Go out and buy it at a store.
There are other ways too, but they generally cost the same or more. If you still want to find them out, just search “Homemade Ways to Get Rid of Static Electricity in Your Microfiber Furniture”.
So, yeah, it’s been a good Christmas… and a shocking New Year.
A Very Television Christmas: Episode 5
Show: Arrested Development
Episode: “Afternoon Delight”
Description: The Bluth Company Christmas party is coming up and it’s acting president, Gob, has been starting to alienate the employees with boasts about his suits. Meanwhile, Michael is trying to avoid a clingy Lucille, upset about Buster being away at Army, and spend more time with George Michael, who has been spending more of his time with Ann. Michael gets help rebuilding the annually-demolished frozen banana stand by Maeby, who is feeling once again neglected by her parent’s. The two decide to hang together to make George Michael and Lindsay jealous, leading to some awkward karaoke.
Thoughts: Another classic Arrested Development episode. Everything from Gob bragging about the price of his suits, to Tobias’s many misfortunes, to the two separate implications of incest brought about by the singing of “Afternoon Delight”, this episode is filled with classic lines and classic moments. Like the last episode, there is very little to do with Christmas outside of the setting, but still a very good watch.
Favorite Lines: Gob: “Sure, the guy in the $600 banana suit… Come on!”
A Very Television Christmas: Episode 4
Show: Arrested Development
Episode: “In God We Trust”
Description: With the traditional Christmas “Living Classics Pageant” coming up, the family has to decide whether they should spend $20,000 to get George Sr. out of prison to take part. Michael and Lindsay, who have started becoming closer, are upset that this is a priority and don’t want Barry Zuckerkorn to be their lawyer. Lucille, however, wants to retain Barry because “he’s very good” and is moved to sabotage by Michael and Lindsay’s friendly behavior. Elsewhere, George Michael has to decide whether to take’s Buster’s spot as Adam in the pageant. Also Maeby’s plot to make her parent’s think she’s running away leads Gob to mistakenly believe Michael is headed to South America.
Thoughts: Hot damn I love this show. It never ceases to crack me up, even after so many viewings. This is also the episode that introduces a tremendously entertaining secondary character in the form of Wayne Jarvis. The episode is very loosely tied to the Christmas holiday, with nary a mention of it outside of the pageant, but does take place during the holiday season and features a few decorations here and there. Still, it’s Arrested Development, so it’s totally worth watching any time of year.
Favorite Lines: Wayne Jarvis: “I shall duck behind that little garbage car.”
Michael: “Guy’s a pro.”
A Very Television Christmas: Episode 3
Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Episode: “T-Shirt of the Dead”
Description: While on a trip to an Egyptian exhibit with Meatwad and Frylock, Master Shake discovers a t-shirt said to be worn by Osiris and possessing magical powers. Shake steals the shirt and attempts to conjure it’s power but is unable to. Because of the age of the shirt it “smells like ass” and Shake gives it to Meatwad to wash. Meatwad washes it with his Christmas stocking, discoloring and shrinking the shirt in the process. Because it now only fits Meatwad, he inherits the shirt and discovers quickly how to wield it’s powers.
Thoughts: This episodes is great if for no other reason than because it has the “Spacecataz” beginning. This episode has always cracked me up which slightly disturbs me. This episode is similar to the last in that it is set in a time of year outside of the Christmas season (sometime in Summer), and really only brings Christmas in incidentally because Meatwad uses his powers to make Santa appear. This may be a slightly anti-Christmas episode as well because Santa is gruesomely injured in this episode.
And it’s absolutely hilarious.
That’s what disturbs me
Favorite Line: Santa Claus: “Do you know that remote control race car he wants? Oh yeah, he’s gonna get it… far up his ass!”
A Very Television Christmas: Episode 2
Show: Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Episode: “Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future”
Description: The Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from the Future comes to visit Carl, reminding him of his childhood Christmas despite it being February. He claims to come back in December before exiting the house. At the same time, Shake arrives at Carl’s to inform him of a little problem with his pool… it’s filled with blood. The Cybernetic Ghost arrives again telling Carl and the gang inane stories of an ape version of Santa Claus and Elves from space.
Thoughts: That is more like a usual Aqua Teen episode description. It’s far more scattered but I find this episode to be a way funnier than “Mail-Order Bride”. It also features a pretty sweet voice cameo by Glenn Danzig. As stated in the description, the episode is set in February, making it only a partial Christmas episode, but does feature the scenes of Carl’s unfortunate childhood Christmas and the telling of the ape Santa, Sir Santa of Claus.
Favorite Line: Meatwad (in his attempted spooky voice): Daaaanzig… You want something to eeeeaaat!”
